Because I Can: The Fear

I've always said running the WHW race should scare you. Not always in a totally all consuming sh%t scared kind of way. But I think if you're not even slightly scared, then I don't think that's right....

For me, the fear this year is different, and rightly so. The fear has been with me since before I entered the ballot though,and constant since then...sometimes more apparent than others. The race is special, and epic, and probably the hardest and one of the most rewarding things I will do in my life. I knew last year before I completed my first that I would want to do it again. Last year there was the fear of the unknown...maybe this year, it's the fear of the known!

And now here I am, with just less than 3 weeks to go, ready to embark on my second quest for the cherished goblet! 3 weeks today, I'll be back on my sofa, smug and exhausted....and with a new profile picture for FB. There's no surprise that the current one has remained in situ for the last year. I can still feel the emotion every time I look at it (and then I remind myself to chose a better outfit this year ha ha).

Sean Stone, me and John Kynaston

There'll be time over the next few weeks to analyse the training. In general, while mileage has been broadly similar to this point last year, the ascent has been greater, and I think there's been more cross-training. What's done now is done, and I believe I've done enough to succeed.

It's never without worry right up to race day. Getting to the start line is more than half the battle! And until this last week there was an increase in fear since the Fling. I've had a niggle in my hamstring/adductors and it wasn't until I completed my 40 for 40 long run this week that the positivity was back in my head. I'd had a shocker of a 'long run' about a week before...bailing twice (thank you to Clark totally reading my mood and coming in the recovery wagon to scoop me up), there were tears, feelings of despair and all sorts of misery...

Thankfully I had my regular sports massage that week, have rested, foam rolled, and while there's still a slight tightness, the next 3 weeks of taper should sort me out.

So, last week I had a big birthday and a great week of holidaying in Aviemore, with a 40 mile run scheduled into the middle of it. A great circular route from Aviemore, along the Speyside Way to Boat of Garten and on to Nethy Bridge. Through Abernethy Forest and onto the Ryvoan Pass....a reverse loop of the Glenmore 24 route, along the front of Loch Morlich, back into Rothiemurchas and across to Loch an Eilein, through to Coylumbridge and back along past Aviemore to our rented 'mansion' (once the family had left after the weekend it felt HUGE!)

At the green lochan

And it felt good! No pressure and no timescale. First 12 miles with Cori Dog, the next 10 practising with my poles (I need to practice for the CCC later this year).

The weather was near perfect - mild, with some breezy bits, some very sunny bits....and overall a smashing day out.

I was trying out some different nutrition (and I'm going to do another blog at some point on this topic). I use oatcakes quite a lot when running (and snacking) and had been given some Nairns goodies to try out. While I have used the 'Snackers' intermittently before and found them palatable (I'd tried the cheese ones mainly when they used to be called Oaty Bakes or something), I'd never seen or tried the Museli Breaks. And I'll definitely be getting some more of these. Twin pack, easy to eat, tasty in a not-too-sweet, not-too-savoury way and seemed to digest and settle well! I also tried out taking a sandwich with me, as that had worked well in Chamonix. Avocado, cheese and ham on wholegrain bread. And I made sure I took the time to pause to eat it. Another winner.

And so, for the rest of the week, some cross-training....in the shape of mountain biking, kayaking (in my super-exciting birthday present), hot tubbing...and a copious amount of eating and drinking! I managed some resting too and the week just absolutely flew past in no time at all!

It has been my biggest mileage week of my training this year at about 58 miles. All of which have felt broadly comfortably good. Super pleased at this. I now know I'm ready, and can say it with confidence!

That's not to say there's now no fear. There are 3 weeks to taper, retaining sound mind and body. Don't break anything. Don't over-do things.

Spend the time finalising (starting!) the planning and packing for the crew.

Panic buy. Just because.

And I've still got some more nutrition to try (I know it's quite late). Having come highly recommended, I've bought some Tailwind which has just become available in the UK.

I tried one pack yesterday and will reserve judgement until I've had another couple of runs using it. It sounds invincible, and like a great fuel for those final stages where the thought of anything makes you want to vomit.... It's hard to replicate that in training though!

So, enough rambling for now...with taperitis about to ensue, there'll be plenty more waffle time for the next 3 weeks....

Run steady,stay safe!